TO TELL OR NOT TO TELL
To Tell or Not to Tell – do I tell them or don’t I? I’ve just made one of the most important decisions in my life. I’ve done the research, looked at the pros and cons, and made the commitment emotionally and financially. I feel great, it’s the right decision for me. Weight loss surgery is going to help change my life in so many ways. I deserve this.
The decision to tell or not to tell now overwhelms me. I feel like a thunderbolt struck right in the middle of my chest. Those euphoric moments of a new slimmer life are replaced with fear, dread, shame, and guilt.
To Tell or Not to Tell
If I tell, who do I tell and why?
What do I expect their response to be?
What if it’s not what I wanted or expected
Can I cope with negative responses to WLS?
Do I have to tell?
If I don’t tell and they find out, how will I cope with that.
Won’t they suspect anyway, I can’t hide a massive weight loss?
If it was them, would they tell.
And on and on and on….
We can never pre-empt what another’s response will be. The very people you thought would support and encourage you through this journey can often be the very people who shoot you down. Comments like:
Just stop eating so much
Get off your backside and exercise.
Surgery is taking the easy way out
You’ve always been big that’s who you are
You will just put it back on like you always do
It’s the lazy persons way of cheating
Just diet and exercise that’s all you need to do
Confiding in someone you thought would have your back and getting an adverse response is devastating
Take the time before disclosing to really think about why you are disclosing. Do you want support and encouragement or are you just telling because you feel obligated to? Maybe it’s because you are excited about a new slimmer future and just want to share that. We want those we love to feel our excitement, to be happy for us like they would an upcoming wedding or birth.
Reflect on Your Intentions
Understanding your motivation for disclosing is important. The need for emotional support, encouragement and accountability from loved ones cannot be underestimated. Having an understanding and compassionate support and/or a support network can make an enormous difference to your journey after weight loss surgery.
Evaluate Your Support System
Sharing your decision for weight loss surgery you may encounter judgement, unsolicited advice, opinions, and privacy concerns. Revealing personal health information might challenge your sense of privacy, especially with acquaintances or colleagues. Many are quick to announce that your weight loss is due to surgery rather than your hard committed work.
Establish clear boundaries with individuals who might not be supportive or understanding, focusing on your well-being. Knowing you have had Weight Loss Surgery some people take on their role in the Food Policing Squad with even more vigour. Scrutinising and issuing “warnings” about how much and what you are eating. Contemplate the extent to which you are comfortable with vulnerability and openness.
Anticipate Potential Reactions
Sharing your story might impact your emotional health. Consider the potential reactions you might receive upon disclosing your weight loss surgery. While some may offer support and encouragement, others might not fully understand the complexities of your decision. Be prepared for a range of responses, both positive and negative. Negative reactions or judgment from others could potentially affect your self-esteem and progress.
Weight Loss Surgery is a recognised medical procedure. You do not need to justify your decision to anyone. Unfortunately, there will always be some who seek to undermine your choice.
Seek Professional Guidance
If you’re unsure about whether to disclose your weight loss surgery, consider seeking guidance from a mental health professional. A therapist can help you navigate your feelings, provide coping strategies, and assist in making an informed decision.
To Tell or Not to Tell – It’s not an easy decision. But whatever you decide, be comfortable and happy with it. Decide, commit, and focus on your weight loss journey with pride and confidence. It’s your life, your decision and you deserve a slimmer healthier body.
If you have any queries or would like to know how we can help you on this amazing life changing journey, please contact us or book a free strategy call via our website https://www.savvybariatrics.com